Alert! Alert! We Are Reaching Strapping Capacity!

Lately, when I talk to people about the Beans I mention “Strapping Capacity” and they haven’t the foggiest idea of what I’m talking about. “Strapping Capacity” is when your family has outgrown the most possible space of your current family vehicle and you have to start strapping family members to the roof….. Like so:As you can see we have the Mister driving, Zach in the front seat, Sam, TJ, and Beans all in the backseat (which is actually impossible with the current car seat laws) and me strapped to the roof of the car (you know its me because of the purse and the knitting needles clenched betwixt my teeth). We would have hit Strapping Capacity already, but Zach being really skinny and not one of those husky kids is the only reason we haven’t had to resort to strappage yet. So, this weekend begins the Great Minivan Hunt of ’07.

With sadness, the Mister and I realized that we have become (out of necessity) Minivan People– something we apparently didn’t try to hard enough to avoid becoming (see kids #1 thru #4). We wanted to be Sporty Sedan People, not Minivan People. I blame him.

There are measures that are going to be taken in the future so that we do not become Church Van People. Mind you, Church Van People aren’t terrible- they have just escaped the confines of the Minivan with their numerous offspring…. something I devoutly refuse to do. I also cannot trust the Mister with this preventitive plan (see kids #1 thru #4). With the recent discovery in the comments of Stepherz blog that removed adenoids can grow back (the Mister had his adenoids removed long before we got together to stop his snoring- and yet he still snores the snoring of jet craft machinary keeping everyone in a building’s radius awake)… I have no doubts whatsoever that were he to get a vesectomy it would all somehow reverse (when I was least expecting it)…. turning us into Church Van People. I blame his Marine training, I’m sure they have a class for that or something- unconciously using your sheer will, anger, and training to grow back severed connections (if you get my drift). Hoo-rah.

We got a bit of an insider tip from a friend who works at a car dealership that you should buy your car at the end of the month, because you can push the salesman for a better deal more at the end of the month when he’s trying to reach his quota than at any other point of the month. Hopefully we’ll have a minivan (that works!) before the end of the week.

I am still plugging away at the Biggest Dishcloth in the world, it helps that last night were repeats of Smallville and Supernatural-otherwise I wouldn’t have got anything done. I did tune in for ER for a second, but I have a hard time watching it knowing that Dr Morris is the voice of Steve from the American Dad cartoon (just like when I had trouble watching it knowing that Dr Chen was the voice of Mulan, and that Nurse Samantha Taggert was Velma from the Scooby Doo movies )…. you will conveniently overlook the fact that I watch House knowing that Dr House was the dad from the Stuart Little movies.



  1. Stephanie, housewife extraordinaire said,

    February 23, 2007 at 3:01 pm

    In April you can get really low interest rates on new cars too….. which sucks to find out after you bought a new car in March.

  2. Sachi said,

    February 24, 2007 at 12:55 am

    Brilliant sketch.

  3. Stepherz said,

    February 24, 2007 at 9:30 am

    I just love the picture! Aren’t you a woman of many talents!?

    Yes, we had the vehicle problem too. I wanted something safe as there are so many deer or snow accidents around here. So I bought an Expedition. Now I’m wondering what fear is more valid– hitting a deer with my car or my car contributing hugely to global warming (and all the implications of that that are far more scary than hitting a deer). I’m now entertaining trading it in for a more emmissions friendly vehicle, nevermind the deer.

    Can you tell I just watched “An Inconvenient Truth?”

    Good luck on finding a car for your family!

  4. Scarlett said,

    February 24, 2007 at 12:36 pm

    I wish I’d had your sketch when I took defensive driving last weekend …

  5. Keppy said,

    February 25, 2007 at 2:22 am

    LMAO We are or have reached maximum strapping capacity in our car, too.

  6. pinsandneedles said,

    February 26, 2007 at 10:54 am

    What?! Dr. Morris is Steve in American Dad?! That I didn’t know.

  7. Vaguely Urban said,

    February 26, 2007 at 1:53 pm

    Think how much easier it will be to get a carseat and baby in and out of a minivan! Heaven!

  8. Zeeppo said,

    February 27, 2007 at 12:45 am

    You see this is why male knitters are scared to hang out with female knitters. They use the V word freely to avoid buying a larger vehicle.

    You would also become SUV people.They do not have the stigma of the minivan people. You can also drive over sedan people. And they have the added bonus of making sure their grand children will not have planet to worry about.

    Oh and by the way you are fficially not allowed to talk tomy wife.

  9. Kelley said,

    February 28, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    Your comment about “Church Van People” totally cracked me up!

    Even if it isn’t a sporty sedan, new cars are so exciting! Did you end-up making a purchase?

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