Uppity Updates

For starters for Vaguely Urban… I couldn’t actually blog a Primanti’s visit (they gave me a serious talking to about taking pics inside the restaurant for some reason) but I did manage to get you this:


I probably had the strangest conversation ever while trying to procure you those, highlights include:
“Why can’t I take a picture of my sandwich? Its my sandwich, I bought it, I’m eating it….. so you’re saying I can do all those things concerning my sandwich and yet I am still not allowed to take a photo of it? What if I was drunk right now and had a camera phone… would that be acceptable? What if I take my sandwich outside and take its picture out there? I assure you the photos of my sandwich will be totally tasteful and not sexually provacitive in any manner… can I take one now? No?”

Because of the swap I am currently participating in I can’t post pics of current projects. Sad, I know, and in leu of this projectless post I thought I would add this tidbit.

I have frequently discussed myself and the Mister’s relationship on here…. not too detailed because frankly I will only coddle your nebbyness (I thought that with the recent Pittsburgh posts I would use a Pittsburgh word…. nebby [neb-bee] means nosey) so much. In any case, this is one of my favorite ‘Us’ stories… don’t worry its not all that gag reflex inspiring…….

Five years ago or so I was out with a friend. He had asked if I had wanted to see a movie at the new Lowe’s down at the Waterfront and I had said ‘sure’ so off we went with his family. So after we watched Exit Wounds we were all riding in the family SUV on the way back to Pittsburgh proper. My friend’s phone rings and he answers, then looks at me and says “Yes, she’s with me” and hands the phone in my general direction. I start to think of all the terrible things that it could be……..
Something ill befell a family member
My dog exploded
The place where I worked exploded
My house exploded
And I tentitively answer , “Yes?”

My friend Sabrina was on the phone and she began to ramble quickly about the reason for her call. I can only imagine what my friend’s parents thought hearing this in the back seat:
“Yes she’s with me” [hands phone to me]
“Yes?” [makes a tangible scaredycat gulping noise]
“What?! Say that again” [looks scared and shocked]
“What do you mean someone has broke into my house?” [getting a little loud due to nerves]
“Have the police been called?”
“No?! Why not?!!!!!”
“What do you mean there was no real reason to?!!!”
[listens intently] {its beneficial at this point in the story to imagine every “…” as the sound of adults talking from Charlie Brown cartoons- waaa waa wa waaa waa}
“So wait…… let me get this straight…. my house was broken into…. there are breaker inners in my house right now as we speak…. Chris Conley climbed the outside of my house…. he broke in the second story window… he went downstairs and opened the front door to let people and a keg in….. so right now at this very minute there is a party occuring at my house….. and no one called the cops?…… Are you there now?…… Why the hell not?!…………… Okay, bye”

So we arrive at my house, sans cops on the front street. I look at the second story window that was supposedly broken in and it looks fine, I wonder if I forgot to lock it. I stand at my front door and listen, no sounds of outrageous fun being had without me in my own apartment. I start wondering if I will have to burn the sheets on my uber comfortable bed because someone who isn’t me is having sex in it. I put my key in lock, I start to hyperventilate in anger. I open the front door, I open my apartment door……..
Quiet.
I wonder if everyone partied and left, leaving me with a huge mess to clean up. I slowly walk up the stairs, terrified I might find my dog passed out drunk from drinking too much Yuengling. I climb the stairs like a Dead Woman Walking to look over the banister and see……
Chris and our friend Vince sitting on the floor in my living room playing the Playstation with the keg between them.
And that was it.
No mess, no explosions, no party leavings- just two guys and a keg playing playstation.
I walk in, speechless.
“Hey Stephieface, how was the movie?” says Vince.
blink

blink, blink

blink
And I say, “The movie was good, marred only by the fact the I got a phone call on Zach’s cell phone that my house was broken into and that you motards were throwing a party in my apartment.”

And Chris says, “Well yeah, we had to break in, we both had to shit really bad.”
And I still married the man… go figure.

ETA: More updates for the update post. A while ago I was contacted by a friend who asked if I was interested in writing for a LARPing magazine. I said ‘sure’ but didn’t hear much back until recently. I received an email where I was offered a job on the writing staff of the Live Action Roleplay (LARP) magazine who’s title I still have yet to divine. And get this………. its a paying job…. how about them apples? So basically I would be just writing articles on anything, I wouldn’t have a specific section per se. Though , I used to write articles for new LARPers, telling them what to bring, what to expect, how tos, etc- so most like I’ll be writing similar articles to those. I already have my first one a brewing in my head…… “How NOT To Be A Stinky LARPer”….. trust me its a bigger problem than you think.

I wish I had known when Utilikilts were voting on their Mock-U-mercials…… I would have totally voted for the “Kiltos” one, which is my favorite of the pack.

And speaking of writing, kilts, and knitting… Didn’t think I could connect the three, did you?…….check out Dave’s site over at Sweater Project. Why? Your reasons:
1. He is a guy, if you recall my #3 favoritest thing that begins with M is Men
2. He wears a kilt- and not just on Scottish holidays or at haggis fest. I don’t know what it is about a man in a kilt, but they make me swoon. No really, they do, 7 years ago I was at a Renn Faire watching the men in kilts swordfight shirtless, I stood there all day and passed out from heat exhaustion and sunburn because I could not (read would not… or better yet refused) to look away…. and to this day I can say with aplomb- “It was totally worth it”. That and I am a card carrying member of the Hack & Slash Flash Zone club and have been since I was 18.
3. He knits, and not just stockinette, we’re talking intarsia/fair isle celtic cables. So when you have to totally rip out a whole sock, he knows your pain.

ETA, ETA: So I just checked my mail, and as I have kids I receive the Build-A-Bear Workshop newsletter ad thingy. Inside was a contest piece to win a trip to Mexico or some other cool prizes:

You lift the “Stones” reveal your secret code and have to go to the store to see what you won. Why am I showing you this? Because of this (Click for closeup):

If I were you Canadians, I’d complain or be proud… I’m not sure which.

ETA, ETA, ETA: For those curious among us who have no idea what a Primanti’s sandwich is:

This picture is from the Primanti’s Site and I believe that is a roast beef and provalone sandwich as a base, with tomato, onion, coleslaw, and fries. Oh yes- everything IS piled all in the sandwich, and it IS as damn good as they claim it is.

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4 Comments

  1. Vaguely Urban said,

    August 8, 2006 at 2:06 pm

    That was sort of dick of the Brothers. Though, let’s be honest, the sandwiches taste a lot better than they look.

    I love the break-in story, btw.

  2. Stephieface said,

    August 8, 2006 at 3:41 pm

    I think it has to do with the store in Oakland. Every other PBros I’ve been to have been ultimo cool, the Oakland college one is the stuck up one.

  3. Stepherz said,

    August 12, 2006 at 8:27 pm

    Man! That sandwich looks amazing. Never heard of a sandwich like that but I’d love to try one!

    And what’s up with my word verification!? It’s a mile long. Might as well have given me the whole alphabet. Geesh!

    ekvegcwdy

  4. Stephanie said,

    August 17, 2006 at 3:10 pm

    holy crap woman! hahahahaha

    what’s with the canadian hatred?


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